What I See With My Asian Eyes
In honor of APPI month, I want to share a personal story.
About a month ago, I received a random text from a stranger to my work phone stating, “You look very Asian with your Single Eyelids.”
Immediately that brought upon decades of shame, internalized racism, and self-hate. I wanted to disappear, hide, and run away. But instead, I chose connection over isolation and decided to open up and share my story.
South Korea is #1 in the world for plastic surgery per capita, and the most popular surgery is the double eyelid surgery, invented during the Korean War to make Korean women more appealing to white soldiers.
It always felt like a rite of passage. My mom got it, her sisters, my Korean girlfriends, and me—at 14 years old, the height of my adolescence and insecurity.
The sad thing is, even afterwards, non-Asians barely noticed. In fact, I’m still getting bullied by random trolls on the internet.
But everything changed when 11 years ago, I got run over by a taxi and almost lost my eyeballs. Instead, I broke the bone under my eye and had to get surgery to replace that instead. It hurt like hell but at least I can still see.
And that’s the beauty of these eyes. They can still see. I can see the sun, sky, mountains, and moon. I can see my ancestors, family, friends, myself, and you. These are what these eyes were made for—to see ourselves and each other. And that’s the takeaway I want to embody as we close out AAPI month.
We all deserve to be and feel seen. And I hope you all can see how beautiful and unique each and every one of us are.